Jacob then takes her to meet his grandfather, who recounts the time that he faced an ancient evil that manifested itself as "different characters all played the exact same way" (a stab at Johnny Depp and his performances as Jack Sparrow, Edward Scissorhands, Willy Wonka and The Mad Hatter), and believes that a similar incident is about to occur.

With this information and a recent spate of people going missing, the Colons are able to deduce that a rogue vampire is creating an army of newborns (or "noobs").

The noobs get Bella's scent from a pornographic magazine, and the Colons realize that they cannot protect her, especially because of Rosalie's homicidal rages toward her and Carlisle's inability to stop himself from drinking her blood.

She seeks refuge with her flamboyantly homosexual father Charlie, but soon realizes that she cannot stay with him either, due to his insistence in graphically describing his sex acts and holding orgies at his house.

Breaking Wind was met with negative reviews, mostly comparing it unfavorably to a similar Twilight parody, Vampires Suck,[4] which was already panned.