Dating

[3] Another meaning of the term dating is to describe a stage in a person's life when they are actively pursuing romantic relationships with different people.

For example, director Blake Edwards wanted to date singing star Julie Andrews, and he joked in parties about her persona by saying that her "endlessly cheerful governess" image from movies such as Mary Poppins and The Sound of Music gave her the image of possibly having "lilacs for pubic hair";[4] Andrews appreciated his humor, sent him lilacs, dated him and later married him, and the couple stayed together for 41 years until his death in 2010.

[8][9] In a similar vein, the stereotype for heterosexual women is that they seek well-educated men who are their age or older with high-paying jobs.

"[10] Women's endorsement of gendered dating norms tends to increase with benevolent sexism, preference for dominant men and long-term relationships.

[6] Some women report privately playing a decisive role in the timing of the marriage proposal, while publicly following gendered courtship conventions.

[6] Some view that women should fulfill the role of primary caregivers, with little to no spousal support and with few services by employers or government such as parental leave or childcare.

For example, Danielle Crittenden in What Our Mothers Didn't Tell Us argued that having both a career and family at the same time was taxing and stressful for a woman; as a result, she suggested that women should date in their early twenties with a seriousness of purpose, marry when their relative beauty permitted them to find a reliable partner, have children, then return to work in their early thirties with kids in school; Crittenden acknowledged that splitting a career path with a ten-year baby-raising hiatus posed difficulties.

With the advent of a changing workplace, the increased participation of women in the labor force, an increasing number of men who are picking up their share of parenting and housework,[18] and more governments and industries committing themselves to achieving gender equality, the question of whether or not, or when to start a family is slowly being recognized as an issue that touches (or should touch) both genders.

This is most likely due to the incomplete cognitive and emotional development of teenagers that cause a lack of ability to handle the challenging aspects of romantic relationships.

[22] Economist Sylvia Ann Hewlett in 2002 found that 55% of 35-year-old career women were childless, while 19% of male corporate executives were, and concluded that "the rule of thumb seems to be that the more successful the woman, the less likely it is she will find a husband or bear a child.

"[34] Adviser Claire Rayner in The Guardian suggests calling people from your address book with whom you haven't been in touch for years and say "I'd love to get back in contact.

[37] In India, transgender individuals and eunuchs have used online dating to help them find partners, but there continue to be strong societal pressures which marginalize them.

A Pew study in 2005 which examined Internet users in long-term relationships including marriage, found that many met by contacts at work or at school.

"[40] Work is a common place to meet potential spouses, although there are some indications that the Internet is overtaking the workplace as an introduction venue.

In The Guardian, British writer Hannah Pool was cynical about being set up on a blind date; she was told, "basically he's you but in a male form" by a mutual friend.

The process of elimination was significant because now the viewer was able hear their voice, see their face and watch their body language to determine a physical attraction to the candidates.

In online dating, individuals create profiles where they disclose personal information, photographs, hobbies, interests, religion and expectations.

[49] Today there are hundreds of sites to choose from and websites designed to fit specific needs such as Match, eHarmony, OkCupid, Zoosk, and ChristianMingle.

[52] Others have suggested that the speed and availability of emerging technologies may be undermining the possibility for couples to have long-term meaningful relationships when finding a replacement partner has potentially become too easy.

[57] In the early 1980s in New York City, software developers wrote algorithms to match singles romantically, sometimes using collaborative filtering technologies.

The industry is dominated by a few large companies, such as EHarmony, Zoosk and InterActiveCorp, or IAC, which owns several brands including Match.com and OkCupid, and new entrants continue to emerge.

Online dating businesses are thriving financially, with growth in members, service offerings, and membership fees and many users renewing their accounts.

Pew Research, based on a 2005 survey of 3,215 adults, estimated that three million Americans had entered into long-term relationships or marriage as a result of meeting on a dating web site.

[67] The Pew study (see table) suggested the Internet was becoming increasingly prominent and accepted as a way to meet people for dates, although there were cautions about deception, the risk of violence,[40] and some concerns about stigmas.

[71] While some of what happens on a date is guided by an understanding of basic, unspoken rules, there is considerable room to experiment, and there are numerous sources of advice available.

"[89] In her Psychology Today column, research scientist, columnist, and author Debby Herbenick compared it to a roller coaster: There's something wonderful, I think, about taking chances on love and sex.

For example, when the 1995 book The Rules appeared, it touched off media controversy about how men and women should relate to each other, with different positions taken by columnist Maureen Dowd of The New York Times[92] and British writer Kira Cochrane of The Guardian[93] and others.

[94][95] It has even caused anthropologists such as Helen Fisher to suggest that dating is a game designed to "impress and capture" which is not about "honesty" but "novelty", "excitement" and even "danger", which can boost dopamine levels in the brain.

[102] Violence while dating isn't limited to any one culture or group or religion, but remains an issue in different countries[103] (It is usually the female who is the victim, but there have been cases where males have been hurt as well.).

[104] One advisor suggested: Don't leave drinks unattended; have an exit plan if things go badly; and ask a friend to call you on your cell phone an hour into the date to ask how it's going.