Etiquette in Japan

Modern Japanese etiquette has a strong influence from that of China and the Western world, but retains many of its unique traditional elements.

Because the ofuro is meant for a relaxing private soak, yet serves numerous people, the bather needs to be careful not to indulge too long.

Many ryokan close the ofuro for several hours every day so the room can be cleaned and aired, and some require guests to sign up for specific soak times.

These baths use water heated by geothermal springs and often are incorporated into resort-like destinations in the countryside where people stay for a day or more.

Many sentō and onsen ban customers with tattoos, which are traditionally taboo, citing concerns over yakuza activity.

[3][4] Basic bows are performed by bending from the waist with the back and neck straight, hands at the sides (males) or clasped at the lap (females), and eyes looking down.

Occasionally, in the case of apology and begging, people crouch (in a position similar to sujud) to show absolute submission or extreme regret.

Even though dogeza was previously considered very formal, today it is mostly regarded as contempt for oneself, so it is not used in everyday settings.

If a business provides such a tray, it is a breach of etiquette to disregard it and instead hold out the money for the cashier to take by hand.

Similar to bon appétit or saying grace, it expresses gratitude for all who played a role in providing the food, including farmers, as well as the living organisms that gave their life to become part of the meal.

[citation needed] In any situation, an uncertain diner can observe what others are doing; for non-Japanese people to ask how to do something properly is also generally received with appreciation for the acknowledgment of cultural differences and expression of interest in learning Japanese ways.

If one must pass food to someone else during a meal (a questionable practice in public), the person picks up the food by reversing the chopsticks to use the end which were not in direct contact with the handlers mouth, and place it on a small plate, allowing the recipient to retrieve it (with the recipient's own chopsticks).

Standing chopsticks vertically in a bowl of rice is avoided, as it recalls burning incense sticks standing up in sand, typically at funerals;[18] the act of stabbing the chopsticks into the food resembles an action devout Buddhists perform when offering ceremonial food to their ancestors at the household shrine.

[19][20][21] Many Japanese restaurants provide diners with single-use wooden/bamboo chopsticks that are snapped apart near their tops (which are thicker than the bottoms).

Shoes are never worn inside the home – this ensures that the floor is not stained by soil, sand or dust that may be attached to the soles.

Instead, shoes are removed in the genkan (mudroom or entrance foyer), and often replaced with slippers called uwabaki.

Thus, a comb, or kushi is a carefully avoided item to give as a gift,[24] as its name is reminiscent of the reading for 49 (shiku), which is a homonym for 'suffering until death'.

[26] As a gift for a new home or a newly opened shop, anything that brings to mind fire or arson is avoided, including an ashtray, stove, heater or cigarette lighter, unless the intended recipient specifically requests it.

[citation needed] Another custom in Japan is for women to give men chocolate on Valentine's Day.

A lazy greeting is regarded with the type of disdain that would accompany a limp handshake in parts of the West.

Instead, the tradition in Japan is for a holiday goer to bring back a souvenir, often edible (see "Gifts and gift-giving").

However, New Year's greeting postcards, or nengajō (年賀状), are a tradition similar to Christmas cards in the West.

If sent within a time limit, the Japanese post office will deliver the cards on the morning of New Year's Day.

[30] There is an entire grammatical rule-set for speaking respectfully to superiors, customers, etc., and this plays a large part in good etiquette and in society as a whole.

Many place great emphasis on politeness, personal responsibility and working together for the universal, rather than the individual, good.

Nevertheless, service at public establishments such as restaurants, drinking places, shops and services is generally friendly, attentive and very polite, as reflected in a common reminder given by managers and employers to their employees: "okyaku-sama wa kami-sama desu" (お客様は神様です), or "the customer is a god."

Generally, service employees will seldom engage in casual conversation with a customer with the aim of forming a rapport as sometimes happens in western cultures.

In Japan this means that employees speak in a humble and deferential manner and use respectful forms of language that elevate the customer.

Formally, there is a small bag called Fukusa (袱紗, also written as 帛紗 and 服紗) in which a person puts the envelope and brings to the funeral.

The title a person writes on the center of the face side is defined by religion as well as when to bring either for the Japanese wake or for the funeral proper.