When her paternal grandfather, Philip Gore, 4th Earl of Arran, died in 1884 and her father inherited the former's titles, she and her sisters were entitled to the nominal prefix of Lady.

On the outbreak of the Second Boer War in 1899, Lord Airlie went with his regiment, the 12th Royal Lancers, to South Africa, where he was killed in action at the Battle of Diamond Hill in 1900.

[1] Following her husband's death, Lady Airlie began to manage Cortachy Castle in Angus on behalf of her eldest son, David, the new earl, who was then only six years old.

[citation needed] In 1953, the countess's employer and lifelong friend, Queen Mary, died, and Elizabeth II appointed her a Dame Grand Cross of the Royal Victorian Order (GCVO) for her many years of service.

As a confidante to Queen Mary, Lady Airlie was a close observer of the fluctuating relationships within the British royal family, and detailed her reminiscences about them in her memoirs.