Shiva (Judaism)
Following the initial period of despair and lamentation immediately after the death, shiva embraces a time when individuals discuss their loss and accept the comfort of others.
The process, dating back to biblical times, formalizes the natural way an individual confronts and overcomes grief.
Shiva allows for the individual to express their sorrow, discuss the loss of a loved one, and slowly reenter society.
[7] The seven-day period of mourning that Joseph underwent was depicted by the sages before the revelation at Mount Sinai.
During this period, which technically precedes the official mourning, the mourner is exempt from performing most positive commandments.
[11] For these seven days the mourners' home is generally an open house for friends and family to come to offer comfort.
After the intense period of shiva, which is mainly contained to the home, during the remainder of sheloshim the bereaved leave their residences and begin to interact with others again.
Sheloshim encourages individuals to participate in social relations in order to slowly ease back into normal daily activities.
The final stage, shenat aveilut, is a twelve-month period of mourning, during which limitations are placed on mourners in the realms of wearing newly-bought clothing, attending social gatherings and receiving gifts.
Burial may not take place on Yom Tov, but can during the intermediate days of Sukkot or Passover, otherwise known as Chol HaMoed.
[1] If a burial occurs on Chol HaMoed of Passover, shiva does not begin until after the Yom Tov is completed.
After hearing of the death of a close relative, Jewish beliefs and traditions instruct individuals to tear their clothing as the primary expression of grief.
This blessing reminds mourners to acknowledge that God has taken the life of a close relative, and is seen as the first step in the acceptance of grief.
After a funeral, or visitation to a cemetery, individuals are required to wash hands as a mark of spiritual transition through water.
There are many different origins of this tradition, though the act is typically associated with symbolic cleansing, the idea being that death is impure in a spiritual sense.
The only time the meal of condolences is not served occurs when there is no public observance of mourning or if the individual died by suicide.
They are lit during major holidays, during Shabbat, and during the process of mourning candles are required to burn for the entirety of shiva.
The light is symbolic of the human being, the wick and flame are representative of the body and soul respectively, as well as their connection with one another.
During major holidays, the candle may be moved in order to lessen the feeling of mourning and focus on the joyous occasion at hand.
A third reason which depicts why mirrors should be covered comes from the law which states that an individual may not stand directly in front of an image or worship one.
[29][30] Aside from those observing shiva or sheloshim, guests and individuals who are not should refrain from wearing leather shoes in the home of mourners as well.
Therefore, in order to prevent grooming for comfort individuals who are mourning are instructed to only bathe separate parts of the body, head, and face.
[8] Therefore, originally, individuals who were observing a period of mourning were required to turn couches or beds over and sit on the ground.
The individual partakes in sitting on a low stool in order to signify their lack of concern for personal comfort during their time of mourning.
13:45): ‘And his head shall be bare’…[41][42]Among Ashkenazi and Sephardic communities the practice is now obsolete, they adhering to the adjudicators of Jewish law that have come of late (Bayit Chadash, the Ṭurei Zahav, and Siftei Cohen) and who have canceled the custom, writing thus: "And at this time, there is no custom of covering up one's head, so that it may not lead to frivolity.
However, there are certain exceptions to this rule, including: not having enough room to house for every individual observing, the loss of another loved one, and the inability to conduct services in the home.
Even as early as 1790, the "Hebra Maarib beZemanah Oheb Shalom" (חברה מעריב בזמנה אוהב שלום) organization was founded in order to provide mourners observing shiva with a minyan.
[45] During 1853 in London, the "Hebrath Menachem Abelim Hesed Ve Emeth" organization was founded to accomplish a similar goal.
[47] Typically recitation of this prayer is done at the graveside during burial, during the unveiling of the tombstone, as in the Yizkor services on Jewish holidays.
Often in Conservative, Reconstructionist, or Reform communities, a minyan is composed of a mix of ten or more adult males and females.
