"Song for Whoever" is a song by English music group the Beautiful South, written by band members Paul Heaton and David Rotheray.

The first and highest-charting single from their debut album, Welcome to the Beautiful South, it peaked at number two on the UK Singles Chart in July 1989 and was certified gold by the British Phonographic Industry (BPI) in August 2024.

Considered typical of the band's gently subversive, self-reflexive signature style,[2] it is sung from the point of view of a cynical songwriter who romances women solely to get material for love songs.

The music video for the song features a blancmange as the main character.

The idea is that there's this conveyor belt and all these pop stars come down it and get rejected by the record company people that then choose a blancmange.