Thieves is a 1977 American comedy film directed by John Berry, written by Herb Gardner, and starring Marlo Thomas, Charles Grodin and Irwin Corey.

Sally wants to bring a juvenile delinquent student of hers named Carlton in to live with them, but Martin reminds her that the boy stole from him the last time they took him in.

Sally returns home to find that Carlton, who stole keys from the building's doorman Devlin, is stashing stolen goods in the apartment.

Sally begins to leave, but Martin fires his gun in the air three times and says they cannot break up until they decide who is at fault, then begs her to stay.

Herb Gardner's screenplay for Thieves was first realized in 1974 as a Broadway stage production of the same name, financed by Paramount in the hopes of drumming up interest for the film version.

[4] Richard Eder of The New York Times wrote that the film "is like a windup toy whose movements are being forced by a jaded and impatient child.

"[6] Arthur D. Murphy of Variety called it "an unfunny comedy" that was "full of superficial humor which doesn't even conceal the hysteria lying just below the characters' surface ... Only Ann Wedgeworth, as a promiscuous apartment dweller, projects any credibility — quite a lot, in fact, to stand out as the film's best performance.

"[8] Gary Arnold of The Washington Post wrote, "Although Gardner reaches for fancy, even heartrending, rhetorical effects, he lacks the lyric of social vision necessary to create something touching or pertinent out of lonely, disillusioned Nice People.