Believe Nothing (2002) is a British sitcom starring Rik Mayall as Quadruple Professor Adonis Cnut,[1] the cleverest man in Britain, and Oxford's leading moral philosopher.
He is paid huge amounts of money for his views, consulted by the government, but he is bored and wants adventure, so he joins the shadowy organization The Council which controls everything going on in the world.
Starring alongside Mayall is Michael Maloney as Brian Albumen, Cnut's faithful servant, and Emily Bruni as Hannah Awkward who becomes professor of pedantics.
The man then turns out to be called Graeme, and Chutney is apparently still on the ground, having lied about the meteor, and is now buying all the world's major companies (including Microsoft) for very reasonable prices.
Unfortunately, Albumen has been illegally selling his confectionery on the Magdalen Bridge (in British imperial units), and all the fudge has been confiscated by the police as evidence.
Adonis disguises himself as Cuban exile Señor Guacamole and visits the somewhat dimwitted US president George W. Shrub, in order to make him believe he has to invade Cuba.
He succeeds, and visits UK prime minister Tony Caring while he is at it, also persuading him he has to declare war on Cuba, but also to leave the European Union and reinstate the old British imperial measures.
Albumen receives a pardon from the prime minister in a foolscap envelope, on quarto parchment, handwritten with ink made from soot and cold tea.
In Double First, Adonis Cnut is suspected of murdering Burger King Professor Sheridan Brinsley in a pub toilet after having appeared on a talk show with him.
As it turns out, Adonis has been mapping human DNA in his secret laboratory for the last few years, and has already started cloning people as well, namely Albumen (a spare one, in case something happens to the original) and himself.
The person who hid it is Edmund Bilyas, a professor who shares quite a few characteristics with Hannibal Lecter, who is now in prison because he ate 11 of his students.
Adonis finds the formula inside a skull and when they come home, he tests the drug on Albumen and on Hannah, who is immediately off to Hollywood (because she is suddenly so happy about her looks) to star together with Anthony Hopkins in "Muteness of the Goats III: The Revenge of Billy".
The new prime minister thanks him by means of giving him a huge statue of himself with golden angel wings ("visible from space") in front of Buckingham Palace.
In Just a Minute, Adonis Cnut has just finished making the pilot for his new TV series called A Long History of Time, "not to be confused with Stephen Hawking's superficial treatment of the same subject".
On the tape, there is evidence that Richard Nixon and Henry Kissinger came up with a plan to manipulate all new digital watches from China to make every hour 30 seconds longer.
Kissinger, who is now in the secret council, warns Adonis about the VCR: it was a gift from the Chinese, who had stuffed it with plutonium to try to kill the president.