[3] To maintain their self-esteem and protect their vulnerable true selves, narcissists seek to control others' behavior, particularly that of their children, whom they view as extensions of themselves.
Thus, narcissistic parents may speak of "carrying the torch", maintaining the family image, or making the mother or father proud.
[6] Destructive narcissistic parents have a pattern of consistently needing to be the focus of attention, exaggerating, seeking compliments, and putting their children down.
Punishment in the form of blame, criticism or emotional blackmail, and attempts to induce guilt may be used to ensure compliance with the parent's wishes and fuel their need for narcissistic supply.
When an alternative arises to the pain and distress caused at home, the child may choose to focus on more comforting, safety-inducing behaviors.
[citation needed] Some common issues in narcissistic parenting result from a lack of appropriate, responsible nurturing.
[citation needed] Narcissistic parenting may also lead to children being either victims or bullies, having a poor or overly inflated body image, using or abusing drugs or alcohol, or acting out (in a potentially harmful manner) for attention.
[10] Narcissistic parents are quick to anger,[9] putting their children at risk for physical and emotional abuse.
Identity crisis, loneliness, and struggle with self-expression are also commonly seen in children raised by a narcissistic parent.
[10] Children of narcissistic parents are taught to submit and conform, causing them to lose touch of themselves as individuals.
[11] The results of a prior study indicated that narcissistic parenting behaviours have an impact on children's self-esteem far into adulthood.
A lot of respondents also mentioned that they needed the approval or affirmation of others in order to feel competent or deserving, and some said that their sense of self depended entirely on how "successful" they perceived themselves to be in terms of their appearance, social life, or academic or professional accomplishments.