"Nothing Is Real but the Girl" is a song by American rock band Blondie.

Written by the band's keyboardist Jimmy Destri, it was the second single released from their seventh album, No Exit (1999), on May 31, 1999.

Destri wrote the song with his daughter in mind; however, when the song was re-recorded for the single release, the narrative was changed from the third person to the first, shifting the focus of the song onto vocalist Debbie Harry.

All tracks were written by Jimmy Destri unless otherwise noted

UK cassette single US CD (promo only)