The Least Worst of the Suicide Machines is a compilation album by the Detroit, Michigan punk rock band The Suicide Machines, released in 2002 by Hollywood Records.

It has tracks from all of the band's albums on the Hollywood label: Destruction by Definition (1996), Battle Hymns (1998), The Suicide Machines (2000), and Steal This Record (2001).

It also includes several previously unreleased bonus tracks.

The album was released shortly after the band had left the Hollywood label and signed with Side One Dummy Records.