"Cool Patrol" is a song by American musical comedy duo Ninja Sex Party.

Written by band members Dan Avidan and Brian Wecht, the song tells the story of Danny Sexbang and Ninja Brian, who, calling themselves the "Cool Patrol", help a bullied high-schooler become tougher and cooler.

The music video features YouTube personality Jacksepticeye as the bullied kid; he also provides minor spoken parts in the song.

[1] YouTube personality Jacksepticeye portrays "The Kid" central to the video, with Markiplier and SuperMega as the other members of the "Cool Patrol".

It also features minor appearances by former Game Grumps editor Barry Kramer and Pamela Horton.