Honour thy father and thy mother

The commandment is generally regarded in Protestant and Jewish sources as the fifth in both the list in Exodus 20:1–21 and in Deuteronomy (Dvarim) 5:1–23.

כבד את־אביך ואת־אמך למען יארכון ימיך על האדמה אשר־יהוה אלהיך נתן לך‎ Kabbēḏ ’eṯ-’āḇîḵā wə’eṯ-’immeḵā ləma‘an ya’ăriḵûn yāmeyḵā ‘al hā’ăḏāmāh ’ăšer-Yəhwāh ’ĕlōheyḵā nōṯēn lāḵ.Honour your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.In the Torah, keeping this commandment was associated with individual benefit[7] and with the ability of the nation of Israel to remain in the land to which God was leading them.

[11][12] According to the prophet Malachi, God makes the analogy himself: "A son honours his father, and a servant his master.

(Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 143:13,25) It also requires honour to one's stepparents[17][18] or an older sibling who is raising one,[19] and one's teachers,[20] though one has a greater obligation to honor a parent than a grandparent.

[21] Keeping this commandment was associated by the Israelites with the ability of the nation of Israel to remain in the land to which God was leading them.

[10] In Deuteronomy, a procedure is described for parents to bring a persistently disobedient son to the city elders for death by stoning.

The descendants of Jonadab son of Recab have carried out the command their forefather gave them, but these people have not obeyed me."

According to the Mishneh Torah, this commandment requires one to honour both of one's parents equally; there is no greater weight given to either the father or the mother.

Because honouring God is above all mitzvot, if a parent asks a child to break a law of the Torah, he/she must refuse to obey.

The words of Jesus and the teaching of Paul indicate that adult children remain obligated to honour their parents by providing for material needs.

In the gospels, Jesus is portrayed as angry with some people who avoided materially providing for their parents by claiming the money they would have used was given to God (Matthew 15:3–8, Mark 7:9–12.

[37][38] Paul's instructions to Timothy regarding the physical care of widows include the following: But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.The import of honouring father and mother is based on the divine origin of the parental role: The divine fatherhood is the source of human fatherhood.

(Exodus 20:12) Respect for parents (filial piety) derives from gratitude toward those who, by the gift of life, their love and their work, have brought their children into the world and enabled them to grow in stature, wisdom, and grace.

...Authority, stability, and a life of relationships within the family constitute the foundations for freedom, security, and fraternity within society.

The family is the community in which, from childhood, one can learn moral values, begin to honour God and make good use of freedom.

Grown children, while not obligated to obedience in the same way, should continue to afford respect for parental wishes, advice and teaching.

When you walk, they will lead you; when you lie down, they will watch over you...'" (Proverbs 6:20–22)[44] The Church teaches that adult children have a duty to honour their parents by providing "material and moral support in old age and in times of illness, loneliness, or distress".

This honour should be based on the son or daughter's gratitude for the life, love and effort given by the parents and motivated by the desire to pay them back in some measure.

[45][46][47][48][49] Father Seraphim Stephens sees "Honor" defined as "Love and Respect", and notes that this commandment is positioned between those that address one's obligations to God and those that relate to how one treats others.

"[51] John Calvin describes the sacred origin of the role of the human father (which thus demands honour).

However, Calvin acknowledges that some fathers are outright wicked and emphasizes there is no excuse for sin in the name of honouring a parent, calling the notion "absurd".

[53] The commentary of John Wesley on the commandment to honour father and mother is consistent with the interpretation in the Catechism of the Catholic Church.

He also encourages people toward honour of those in spiritual leadership with the question, "Have ye all obeyed them that watch over your souls, and esteemed them highly in love for their work's sake?"

This is an example to orphans; if they fall into the hands of those who love them and take care of them, let them make suitable returns of duty and affection.

In his commentary, Calvin notes the harsh consequences required in Exodus and Leviticus for specific failures to keep the commandment.

[59] Persistently disobedient sons were to be brought before the city elders and stoned by the whole community if the parents' testimony was judged to be accurate.

[60] Calvin writes that God knew capital punishment for these offences would seem harsh and be difficult to pronounce, even for those responsible for adjudicating the situation.

In 1 Samuel 26 David spares Saul's life, even at the risk of losing his own, submitting to the authority God had placed over him as anointed king.

[36] This commandment is distinct from the others in that a promise is attached to it: "...so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.