Stephen Butler, of Bury Lodge, Hambledon, Hampshire, by his first wife Mary Ann Thistlethwayte, daughter of Thomas Thistlethwayte (1779–1850), of Southwick Park; Deputy Lieutenant of Hampshire, hereditary Constable of Porchester Castle and warden of the Forest of Bere.

He was educated privately and gazetted as Ensign to the 1st Bengal European Fusiliers, 9 June 1854; Lieutenant, 23 November 1856, and was afterwards Instructor of Musketry.

He also took part in the actions of Gungehri, Pu and Minpoorie and was present at the Siege and capture of Lucknow where he won the Victoria Cross.

[1] He was 22 years old, and a lieutenant in the 1st European Bengal Fusiliers (later Royal Munster Fusiliers) during the Indian Mutiny when the following deed took place on 9 March 1858 at Lucknow, India, for which he was awarded the VC: "Of which success the skirmishers on the other side of the river were subsequently apprised by Lieutenant Butler, of the Bengal Fusiliers, who swam across the Goomtee, and, climbing the parapet, remained in that position for a considerable time, under a heavy fire of musketry, until the work was occupied."

(Extract of Lieutenant-General Sir James Outram's memorandum of operations carried on under his command at the siege of Lucknow, published in the Governor-General's Gazette Extraordinary, of the 5th April, 1858, and re-published in General Orders by the Commander-in-Chief in India, on the 27th of December, 1858.