[citation needed] Written by The Goodies, with songs and music by Bill Oddie.
Tim tries to help, but after losing money and his clothes to gambling hustlers Bill and Graeme, ends up becoming an athlete too.
To survive, the athletes turn to crime, and Tim steals the Queen's tiara as she greets spectators.
Because all of the athletes have disappeared, and not knowing what Graeme and Bill are up to, Tim augments the composition of the Summer Olympics with poetry and literature to improve Britain's chances of victory.
Under the changed rules, athletic prowess is no longer enough to guarantee Olympic victory and actors become the new champions.